One of my mottos for 2018 is that it would be the year of living stylishly. That I would get over my fears of wearing certain things because they would make me look fat or they were too out there. That I would simply just say yes to absolutely everything and anything.
This has not yet materialised. That might be because I’m skint but it is more likely to be that I still haven’t gotten to grips with this confidence malarkey. That and the fact I rotate my wardrobe around hoodies, trainers and gym leggings. I also never really go anywhere so feel a bit of a tit dressed to the nines for the solitary hour of class I have on a Monday.
I really love clothes. I always have. When on trips to Hawick to visit my Granny when I was younger I was always scouting out the new in of the Kylie section tucked at the back of M&Co. I adored family trips to Ocean Terminal at Christmas time as I would get to delve into New Look, Crew Clothing and Superdry. I poured over Mini Boden and Next catalogues, circling items I wanted and craftily bending over the page, hoping my mum would take note.
And this hasn’t changed as I’ve gotten older. I scroll Instagram soaking up what my favourite bloggers are wearing, trot around Urban Outfitters, Monki and Mango looking for style inspiration and look through my flatmates wardrobes wishing I was their size.
But one thing that has changed is the acceptance I have for my shape. The level of confidence I have to wear what I want. This has diminished that for a while I’ve hid behind gym leggings, hoodies, the one pair of black jeans I like and a few striped tops. Whilst I still wanted to experiment with my style and where the craziest thing to land in Urban Outfitters, my lack of confidence and fear of being ‘fat’ was holding me back in a massive way.
So this year, I’m working on the ‘fuck it’ attitude and wearing whatever the hell I want. As the wise Dua Lipa said, IDGAF. I’m going to wear the purple corduroy dungarees lurking in my wardrobe, wear the damn beret I bought in Primark, wear sunglasses in winter, all the summer dresses and stop stressing over whether it highlights my back fat or fat arms.
I know my personal style is in there somewhere so in the heart of accepting myself and vowing to be kinder to myself and doing what I want. I wanted to pull together an inspiration board on my blog mainly for me to look at but if you too are stuck in a style rut and have no clue what you bloody want or can’t quite get to where you want because of the ‘feeling fat fear’ like yours truly, this is for you to pals.
It is a bit of a strange mix perhaps but my ideal style would be pulling together elements of each – the rock n roll of Lily Melrose, colour from Megan Ellaby, tailored chic from Chloe Plumstead and slow and laid-back from Allie Smith.
SHOP THE OUTFIT
jumper, ASOS | trousers, Collectif | shoes, New Look | necklace, Dorothy Perkins | bag, New Look | sunglasses, Primark
[photos by Claire]
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